Ian Stewart Black

Modern master of classical poetry

Month: December, 2009

Demon

You are never more my friend,

You swore to me I’m not insane,

When depression broke my back,

Now you condemn me for the same.

 

You spread poison through my dreams

And tainted my girl’s mind.

There was not an angel in you,

But a demon of the worst kind.

 

I thought that I could trust you,

But now I see you without grace,

Now I have found my dearest friend –

To curse my name in my love’s face.

 

All the while I’d faith in you,

I took shelter in your affection.

I knew that you were all I had,

Now once again, I know rejection.

 

I labelled you my only friend,

And you kept your hate well hid,

But your betrayal cut me deeper

Than my own blade ever did.

 

So now I find I’ve nothing left,

My one light gone as you transgress.

Of all the things I knew you were,

I never knew that you were heartless.

 

I hate you more with every second –

That you continue to pretend.

You are far, now, from an angel,

And you are never more my friend.

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Mirror’s edge

My heart is pounding deeply

The skyline flashes red

My legs are aching, still I run

I’ll run, or end up dead

Looking out, the city looms

And reaches for the sun

Buildings glisten with silver silence

Through opression’s grasp, I run

Running to escape the terror

Of this all-seeing hell

Where freedom doesn’t stand a chance

For mankind, I rebel

The gunshots were so violent

But now I hear no sound

Except the laboured metronome

Of my footsteps on the ground

The ground, composed of rooftops,

Skyscrapers in the sun

As my vision blurs with weakness

Still, I have to run.

I’ll run until this grasp is broken

Until humanity returns

And even if they take my life

We’ll see their system burn.

creature of the night

I feel you drawing nearer

I’m not sure that I care

I know that it’s too late to run

I can smell you in the air

I know that you’ll take over

I know that you’ll succeed

How could I resist your passion

When you’re asking me to bleed?

I feel your hands rest on my waist

I press my body into you

I feel your gaze burn through my neck

There’s nothing I can do

Even if I did fight back

There’s no way I could win

So I choose to settle down

And let your blackness draw me in

I feel your breath preparing

I feel your tender bite

Does my warm blood satisfy you?

My creature of the night.

Dead rose

Far away, the snow is falling

Far away, a girl lets go

Sobbing out her blazing heart

As winter’s grasp takes hold

She kneels out in the open

With no-one to take hold

Of her body as she’s shaking

And she’s screaming in the cold

Far away a boy is laughing

As he holds his brand new girl

Forgetting how he broke the last

And stole the beauty from her world

So she lies out in the open

Staring at the sky

The snow falls gently on her face

And she cannot help but cry

The boy is taking in his fix

Of his new and polished prize

Their lives are just a fucking game

As he tells his ‘loving’ lies

He swore to be with his girl

Until the end of time

He said it just to keep her happy

And for a while, it worked just fine.

But now his work can’t be undone

As a blazing heart is frozen

As gleaming eyes are frosted over

And a dead rose paints the snow.

Live to feel

Perhaps I was wrong,

And my tears have been in vain.

Every time I cried for sorrow –

Every time I cried your name.

 

Can you place humanity?

Can you find it here, on me?

Perhaps I grow yet more alive

With each tear I set free.

 

I would say I live to feel

And without my heart, I am through

But the pain of loss is life indeed

And abundant without you.

 

Need I view myself as dead

In removal from your love?

When I am screaming out in pain

For all I still dream of.

 

Some might say I’m living deeper

Than I ever lived before

If human life is nought but feeling

And I feel skewered to my core.

 

And so, do not think me a corpse

Because I only live in pain

Perhaps I live in the truest sense

Because I live in vain

But I would say a life is nothing

If your dreams elude your hand

And so, I ask you, think of me

As a hollow, dying man.

How little things change

From the very second

My eyes discovered you

I knew just what you were

And I quickly found out who

‘Her name is Lucy Walker’

Someone must have said

I don’t remember much about it

Though I know my face went red

I could see your roaming nature

From the way you moved in haste

I could see that I was yours

From my first glimpse of your face

I tried to make you overhear

Every word from my mouth

In hopes that, maybe, if you heard

You would find me out

Eventually, I made my move

In a sweet and childish ploy

As I walked home next to you

Your gentle beauty, bright and coy 

I stole your tie from round your neck

And started walking back

I knew you’d follow, and so I tried

To make a time to ask

I was so nervous, no surprise

You were always more than I

And so, I was taken quite aback

When you said that we could try

I remember how you looked at me

With your icy, warming eyes

And nodded with the sweetest smile

I swear I could have cried

For such a divine creature

To let herself be mine

Is something saved for fantasy

When all reason resigns

And yet I never thought it out

Our fate was set right there

I could never be enough

For a shining soul so rare

And so I gave it everything

And I’m sure that you did too

But it always fell apart

Now there is no me and you

So I just write these poems

To relive the old days

When I was truly happy

And enthralled by your gaze

 

You’re still so sweetly timid

And unaltered by time

Still reaching out for rainbows

I still wish that you were mine.

 

And if you ever read this

Just know that I’m still there

Still lying close beside you

In the grass and in the air.

Please know that these are not enough

These verses that I shape

Petty words are a peasant’s tool

Because I know I can’t escape

The asylum of my waking life

As I stumble through this maze

Just praying that I find your light

Before the end of days.

Because you are all that matters

Like you have always been

With your touch I am a king

And without, a tramp, my queen.

 

And so I forge another plea

And watch as it takes flight

May it find the lap of God

And may he make things right.

Light of the forest

You walk, entwined with nature,

As some goddess, incarnate.

Your footsteps leave no trace of presence,

As the wind resounds your name.

Your touch brings life to barren land,

The forest is your child.

Every tree of your conception,

And every blade of grass, your own.

In your wake, you shape creation,

Only beauty springs to life.

And in your breath, the spark of grace,

To illuminate your world.

When you walk, the sky surrenders,

To the beauty of your air.

To paint the woods and fields so gently,

With incandescent amber light.

And when you rest, the stars awaken,

To the sweetness of your dreams.

All the world is in repose

And will only wake for you.

Echo

The running water echoes,

And beats inside my head,

I’ve cried for this so many times,

I’d rather now be dead.

I scrub so hard, but you remain,

The corruption of your will.

On that night, I was undone,

I was broken for your thrill.

 

I can hear the raindrops echo,

As they crashed down all around.

I still see your manic eyes,

As you threw me to the ground.

I remember how I struggled,

And begged for you to stop,

I remember how I wept and shuddered,

As you pressed your weight on top.

And every day, I’ll feel again,

That I’d rather just have died,

Than be living with the memory

Of how you forced your way inside.

Of how you used me as you wanted,

Of how your lust impaled my dreams.

And now I have, but nightmares,

Of how you smiled as I screamed.

 

Now there is no echo,

This water flows, discreet,

With every tear that hits my pillow,

I see my body hit the street.

I just wish there was a way –

To make myself forget.

But I know I never will,

And I wish you’d left me dead.

Lust

Hunger screaming out again,

I would kill to quench this thirst.

I try so hard to fight the urge,

But I’m taken by my lust.

I feel her beating fast below,

As I watch her body writhe.

I can see her going down,

This rush, to keep me alive.

I feel her warmth, so fluid,

Pleasure, too sweet to be denied.

As her flooding gate has opened,

I’m sinking deeper, yet, inside.

Her lips are flushing ruby red,

Her eyes are screaming out at me.

With every breath it just gets better,

As her body craves release.

And then, at last, it comes,

And I find myself awakened.

Our long awaited climax,

Then I leave her body shaking.

Repentance

I’ve lived forever

And yet forever, without you.

So many times I’ve drawn forth blood,

So many sins I can’t undo.

Oh, how I thought myself transcendant

With my proud, immortal blood.

I even thought myself your equal

With every throat I cut.

That I should have such power,

And shape myself a beast –

Is a crime beyond forgiveness,

Of any holy man or priest.

How did I descend as thus,

A man into a shade,

A predator of empty heart,

Who let his purpose fade.

What i have sold cannot be bought,

The virtue of my soul.

That I once thought so little of,

Slipped away, each life I stole.

And now I rule the darkened night,

When I once could seize the day.

Oh Lord, what is eternal life –

When I have let my soul decay?

So now I watch the sunrise

And to my heart, embrace it close.

Dear God, please forgive me –

And make a spirit from this ghost.